Saturday, 19 February 2011

Breaking point

I can't seem to get a handle on my emotions at all these past few weeks. I go from hyper and happy to barely wanting to get out of bed. I don't know what's going on. I'm not taking any real joy out of anything that i'm doing at the moment. I find all of it exhausting.

Anyway, I spent today looking at houses and it made me feel awful. I want to live somewhere, I'm tired of being a nomad who decorates with blu-tack. At the same time, since i didn't get this job, there's nothing keeping me in Brighton. I don't know what's going on or what i want to do. It would all be so much easier if someone just told me what to do.

Blah. Anyway, to cheer myself up I started looking at directing courses. I love film, but directing for the stage is so much fun, and I have more experience in it. These courses look so amazing.

The RADA and LAMDA ones especially. Hugely competitive though. Kind of terrifying.

But really, what am i worrying about. Everyone wants to hire a girl who graduated with a 2:1 in English Lit and Film, with no work experience and no place to live, right? I'm a fucking catch!

1 comment:

Flo said...

I think it's definitely worth looking at a directing course - my sister has been trying out the director thing for the past year or so and it seems like everywhere she goes likes her, but wants somebody with more experience. Or you could start your own theatre company with people who want to get into acting and cut a deal with a pub theatre. As far I can tell, the theatre world (like most professions) is all about networking. Or, just chill the fuck out for a year after uni and get a bar job. Doesn't really matter at this stage, you're young and hot and that and at this stage there's no point rushing into anything.

Oh, I occasionally read your blog by the way.

Also, I watched all the episodes of Angel where he's Angelus and they're awesome. Good luck with Antigone my dear xxx